Rainbow Lounge: LGBTQ Aging Well Peer Support Group (Hudson, NY)

Q-MoB (Queer Men of the Berkshires)

LGBTQ 40 &amp; up support one another in negotiating many transitions of aging well: health, relationships, work/purpose, housing,  finances etc

The Spark of Hudson

LAVENDER LOUNGE: LGBTQ+ AGING WELL PEER SUPPORT GROUP 1st &amp; 3rd Wednesdays, 6:30-8pm Spark of Hudson Building (Entrance on 5th St next to Cherry Alley; come up to Living Room on 2nd Floor) 502 Union St Hudson, NY 12534MISSION &amp; TOPICS: LGBTQ+ people 40 &amp; up meet twice monthly (1st &amp; 3rd Wednesdays) to share food &amp; provide peer support to one another for negotiating the inevitable changes/challenges in the following areas associated with aging well:<ul><li>Relationships (family, chose family, friends, lovers)</li><li>Health (changes in stamina, dealing with loss of muscle mass, increase in belly fat, slowing of metabolism, chronic pain, chronic illness, loss of hearing &amp; sight, etc)</li><li>Housing (being able to afford to stay in your house &amp; keep up with the maintenance, mobility in your house, downsizing, etc)</li><li>Grieving the loss/change of relationships, phyiscal &amp; mental stamina, health, resources, sexuality, &amp; autonomy</li><li>Financial Resources &amp; Risks (how can you plan for your most important financial risks on a fixed income, manage to find affordable health insurance that effectively manages healthcare financial risks, and manage to create abundance)</li><li>Work/Purpose (record numbers of queer elders are forestalling retirement &amp; continuing to work or consult and others find transitioning to retirement and service challenging because their work so defined their identity; other's are having to work multiple part-time jobs just to make ends meet)</li><li>Spirituality/Mindfulness (many queer men have the time &amp; motivation to inquire about spirituality/mindfulness/is this all there is questions, but find traditional Christianity, Islam, and other mainstream religions not very welcoming or relevant to their lives)</li><li>Play/Creativity: changes in what brings you fun and builds your creativity and being willing to try new things with new people and in new settings.</li></ul>SHARED VALUES: This peer support group agrees to practice the following shared values together to create a safe &amp; empowering container for all of us to learn and grow in:1) Being Vulnerable: practice sharing our true thoughts, feelings, and even conflicting thoughts &amp; feelings 2) Asking for Help: being willing to be part of a team and to ask for help and to provide help if our experience might benefit another group member 3) Sharing only our own experience &amp; not giving advice: sharing only our own experience (I statements), and not giving anyone advice, knowing our experience, capacity, and resources are always different from others 4) Confidentiality: not sharing anything that is said in the group in a way that could be identified with a particular person 5) Listening with curiosity &amp; empathy: we endeavor to keep an open mind and heart when listening to others and strive to wish them nothing but the best 6) Building &amp; being part of a team: we will practice attending to our own needs &amp; visions, AND the needs, capacities, challenges, and resources of our team. We will cultivate being part of a group that is smarter and better resourced than any of its individual members. 7) Focus on our strengths, hope, capacity &amp; resources: we will avoid or minimize predicting failure, focusing only on our weaknesses and lack of capacity or resources, and instead focus on our strengths, hope, capacity, &amp; resources. We will be open to solutions and resources &amp; capacities that develop through teamwork.C0-FACILITATORS: We are looking for Co-Facilitators who live in Columbia County and represent the diversity of the LGBTQ+ community, and until they are trained, our founding co-facilitators will be:<ul><li>David Pais, co-lead a group for 5 years for people recently diagnosed with HIV in Chelsea from 1994-1999. He left to earn an MA in counseling from Loyola -Chicago and did a practicum year at the LGBT Center for people who were just coming out.</li><li>Bart Church, Q-MoB Interim Executive Director has been organizing queer educational and peer support groups for more than 25 years and helping his 86 year old parents negotiate their aging well process, as well as the aging well process of his many queer friends who are in their 60s, 70s, and 80s. WHAT TO BRING:</li><li>A sense of which of the topics above you are most focused on and what support or information you might need to take your next step</li><li>A tapas (finger food) or healthy snack and/or non-alcoholic beverage to share</li><li>$10-$20 Tax-Deductible Donation <a href="https://secure.lglforms.com/form_engine/s/sqXpukhQeFaNTYPSNT4wXw" title="https://secure.lglforms.com/form_engine/s/sqXpukhQeFaNTYPSNT4wXw" target="_blank" data-msys-clicktrack="0" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer">Paid Online</a>, in cash, or check made out to "BSCC" (Q-MoB's 501(c)3 Non-Profit Fiscal Sponsor), or if this is your 1st time ever at a Q-MoB event your 1st time is FREE, or if you come regularly or want to support our work with rural queer men all over the region, please <a href="https://secure.lglforms.com/form_engine/s/mD2EE7hxeanQhXexvRAi2A" title="https://secure.lglforms.com/form_engine/s/mD2EE7hxeanQhXexvRAi2A" target="_blank" data-msys-clicktrack="0" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer">JOIN Q-MOB</a> so you never have to donate at any regular Q-MoB event. Please note we also encourage participants to donat to the Spark of Hudson Foundation, which provides our beautiful meeting space free &amp; supports many other community-based initiatives.</li></ul>STARTLING DATA ON THE COMING LGBTQ+ AGING CRISIS/OPPORTUNIT: Here is some startling data from the<a href="https://www.sageusa.org/resource-posts/facts-on-lgbt-aging/" title="https://www.sageusa.org/resource-posts/facts-on-lgbt-aging/" target="_blank" data-msys-clicktrack="0" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer"> largest study ever done on LGBTQ+ seniors</a> that underscores the aging crisis many LGBTQ seniors are facing, and also shows how powerful the Boomers and Gen X have been in collaborating to fight AIDS and government inaction on AIDS and in building a powerful network of action and support that saved millions of lives. The coming health, social, &amp; economic crisis LGBTQ seniors are facing is just the next in a long line of challenges the queer community has faced and overcome by coming together to learn and take action together: <ul><li>More than 3 million <a href="https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/2021/12/16/lgbtq-tiktok-stand-in-family-facebook/6466772001/" title="https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/2021/12/16/lgbtq-tiktok-stand-in-family-facebook/6466772001/" target="_blank" data-msys-clicktrack="0" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer">LGBTQ adults</a> over age 50 live in the U.S. – and more than half of them feel isolated from others and 59 percent report feeling a lack of companionship. This population is set to grow to about 7 million by 2030 (6 years from now). The LGBTQ senior population in the region is growing even faster because of COVID migrations from the big cities.</li></ul> <ul><li>7 out of 10 LGBT older adults live alone as compared to 3 out of 10 heterosexual older adults. The social isolation of living alone, compounded by the fears of allowing homecare, chore-service, and other lay and professional staff into one’s home create a significant barrier for care. LGBT older adults often feel they have no one to call in times of need.</li></ul> <ul><li>9 out of 10 LGBT older adults have no children to help care for them as compared to 2 out of 10 heterosexual older adults. Furthermore, LGBT older adults have often been ostracized from an extended network of family members based on their sexual orientation or gender identity. LGBT older adults tend to form extended friend networks or “chosen families” that they rely on to help care for them at times of need. Unlike heterosexual family structures that are intergenerational, chosen families tend to be comprised of peers who are, as they age, facing the same care challenges.</li></ul> <ul><li>LGBT older adults are nearly 3 times as likely to live in poverty as heterosexual older adults, and to have lower lifetime incomes and retirement incomes.</li></ul>CARPOOLING/RIDE-SHARE: If you need a ride or are open to carpooling, please indicate that when you are registering, &amp; our ride coordinator will try to match you with people nearby who are interested in carpooling or offering rides. We encourage carpooling because it is a great way to make new friends, save money on gas, reduce your carbon footprint, and have a designated driver should you want to drink and not drive.<a href="https://secure.lglforms.com/form_engine/s/sqXpukhQeFaNTYPSNT4wXw" title="https://secure.lglforms.com/form_engine/s/sqXpukhQeFaNTYPSNT4wXw" target="_blank" data-msys-clicktrack="0" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer">DONATE</a> OR <a href="https://secure.lglforms.com/form_engine/s/mD2EE7hxeanQhXexvRAi2A" title="https://secure.lglforms.com/form_engine/s/mD2EE7hxeanQhXexvRAi2A" target="_blank" data-msys-clicktrack="0" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer">BECOME A MONTHLY SUSTAINING MEMBER</a>: Please donate $10-$20 to help assure Q-MoB can continue to offer more than 25 activities &amp; multiple resources &amp; services to rural queer men all over the region. If you attend 2 or more Q-MoB events/month, please consider becoming a monthly sustaining donor member. By donating $25, $50, $75, or $100/month you can help to sustain the incredible variety of activities, services, and resources Q-MoB provides and assure all of these activities are accessible to men regardless of their age, income, or ability, and best of all you can avoid having to donate at each and every event you attend. Monthly Sustaining Members pay only once a month and then can attend all our activities with no further donation.REACHING US THE DAY OF THE EVENT: If the day of the event you cannot join us, have trouble finding the group, or will be late, please text one of the Co-Hosts: David at <a href="tel:9293028233" title="tel:9293028233" target="_blank" data-msys-clicktrack="0" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer">929-302-8233</a> or Bart at 503-734-6508.

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