Self-Connection - 4-week Online Program starts 10/29

This Fall we invite you to come join us in creating or deepening your practice of Self-Connection, the foundational practice upon which effective communication skills are built!

*** Please read the "Prerequisite" section below to check you already have the prerequisite, or to find out how you can get it.

This is a 4-week committed ONLINE program. Class times/dates: 7pm to 9pm Pacific on Wednesday October 29th, November 5th, 12th, 19th, 2025.

Earlybird price until Oct 22nd, 2025: $90

Sliding scale pricing $160 - $110 per person for the program. The sliding scale pricing means we'd love to receive $160 per person for the program, since this price is chosen to support the sustainability of the Communication Dojo. However, we also want to be able to welcome those for whom the $160 price is not affordable, so we're making a range of ticket prices available.

If money is an obstacle please write to us at info@communicationdojo.com to ask about possible payment plans or partial/full scholarships.

Upon receipt of your payment we will email you:

• ​The Zoom link for the weekly sessions
• Details on how to access the online resource area and/or app where you'll find
• -> Recordings of the weekly Zoom sessions
• -> Daily videos
• -> Written resources

​"Nonviolent communication (or Connected Communication) has helped me and my partner speak in a much more conscious and effective way. It was a perfect transition and supplement to our prior couples therapy. It helps in every way, at work, with friends, with family, etc. I can't recommend these classes and Newt as a teacher enough. I wish we all had to take NVC classes in school, it would change the world." ~ Elise H., San Francisco

Prerequisite - "Listening with Empathy"

​We welcome you to join us if you already have familiarity and practice with the Nonviolent Communication skill of "Listening with Empathy."

​You might have studied and practiced this skill in Communication Dojo workshops, or in other Nonviolent Communication workshops.

​If you'd like learn or refresh your "Listening with Empathy" skills..

We recommend our 2-hour Monday drop-in classes on Oct 20th and Oct 27th (before the Fall Self-Connection Program) and Nov 3rd (during the Self-Connection Program):

• October 20th: Connected Conversation Process
• October 27th: "Listening with Empathy compared with other Common Communication Choices"
• November 3rd: "Empathy Guesses"

​​​​If you'd like more clarity on what we mean by "Listening with Empathy", please visit our resource page: Empathic Listening Pairs for more information including a handout, videos and quick tips.

Description of the 4-week Self-Connection Program

JOIN US AT THE COMMUNICATION DOJO FOR THIS WEEKLY OPPORTUNITY TO IMMERSE YOURSELF IN NONVIOLENT COMMUNICATION AND TO WORK ON REAL CHALLENGES FROM YOUR LIFE

We often say, in Communication Dojo workshops, that 90% of Nonviolent Communication is contained within the practice we call "Self-Connection."

​Another way of saying this is that if we want to communicate more skillfully and effectively with another person, it's important that we are mindful about how we think about ourselves and the other person, during the periods between our conversations.

​If we spend out time between conversations thinking in circles about how right we are, and how wrong the other person is, or vice-versa, then that's the kind of thinking, and communication, we'll bring into the next conversation. ​

"Never give anyone the power to make you submit or rebel."

~ Marshall Rosenberg, Ph.D.

​If we spend our time between conversations convincing ourselves of our "rightness," the next conversation is likely to be a "rebellion" i.e. we are likely to fight against the other person with the sense that we have "right on our side."​

If we spend our time between conversations convincing ourselves of our "wrongness," the next conversation is likely to be a "submission" in which we give up on our own needs.

​There's a third option for what we can do between conversations, which we call "Self-Connection Practice."

Self-Connection practice allows us to start wherever we are, even if we're angry or sad or confused, even if we're thinking in terms of right/wrong, good/bad, judgment or self-judgment, blame or self-blame, criticism or self-criticism, shoulds, or demands. Every one of these thoughts is trying to tell us about what's important to us, and self-connection practice helps us understand the message underneath the thoughts.

​Instead of getting stuck in the whirlwind of these thoughts, we can take any one of the thoughts as a starting point for Self-Connection practice, which means we focus or refocus on:

• Our own humanity
• The humanity of the other person
• The actions we believe would better meet our needs and those of the other person - actions we can take individually, or the other person can take individually, or that we can take together, or with the support of our community.

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"As soon as you concern yourself with the 'good' and 'bad' of your fellows, you create an opening in your heart for maliciousness to enter. Testing, competing with, and criticizing others weaken and defeat you."

~ Morihei Ueshiba, Founder of Aikido

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At Communication Dojo we aim to create community environments for the study and practice of Nonviolent Communication. We also believe, and know from our own lived experience, that to really integrate what Nonviolent Communication has to offer requires self-connection in between classes or group practice sessions.

Many people have told me that they are much more able to practice self-connection when they have the support of others who are engaged in the same practice. The Communication Dojo "Self-Connection Program" is an opportunity for us to support you in building a self-connection practice, not just during Communication Dojo classes or practice sessions, but on a daily basis. ​

It can start with no more time than you might spend brushing your teeth. 2 minutes of self-connection, twice a day, is already be a powerful alternative to circular thinking and running imaginary arguments in your head.

With our support and the support of like-minded community, you might develop this practice so that it becomes the new normal in your life. Self-connection between conversations leads to a greater capacity for self-connection, compassion, and assertiveness without aggression during conversations that might previously have turned to fights.

Self-connection practice helps us grow the capacity to learn and grow from challenges, and to orient toward solutions that honor our own needs and the needs of those we're in contact with - to enrich and support life!

To support your practice we're inviting you to commit to our Self-Connection Program for 4 weeks in Oct/Nov 2025.

We'll get the ball rolling with a 2-hour learning, practice and community-building live online session on Wednesday Oct 29th, 7pm - 9pm Pacific, then continue on Nov 5th, 12th & 19th, all at 7pm - 9pm Pacific.

​The whole-group portions of these sessions (presentations, demonstrations, participant comments and Q&A) will be recorded so you can use them to catch up if you miss a session, or revisit them at your leisure until May 1st, 2026.

​And, perhaps even more importantly, we'll support your practice between sessions using:

• Daily video to support your self-connection practice throughout the challenge.
• Online community & resource area, including recordings of presentations, demonstrations, participant comments and Q&A from our live sessions.​

• Support with finding and organizing practice with a practice partner, for those who would like community support with their practice.

• Tools for keeping track of your practice and turning it into actions to meet needs for you and others with whom you're in community

• Pre-recorded materials that give more examples various alternative approaches to self-connection

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Some features of the Communication Dojo practice environment:

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• Chances to use your real-life situations to guide experiential learning
• Efficient use of group time to maximize learning
• High proportion of practice time in pairs - learning communication by communicating.
• Minimal "jargon" i.e. language that might be confusing or alienating for those not familiar with NVC.
• Little likelihood of people developing any sense of "Doing it wrong" or "Trying to do it right."
• Mixture of experience levels deepens practice and learning

Bring your real situations to the dojo!

Who’s it for?

You're new-ish to NVC, but you already have some familiarity and practice with the NVC skill of "Listening with Empathy"? - Come along and let us help you introduce Self-Connection Practice into your NVC toolkit. Why not deepen your ability with a practice that we believe is 90% of Nonviolent Communication!? See the "Pre-requisites" section above to find out how you can get the pre-requisite.

You're experienced with NVC? Maybe you've already been involved with NVC for a while, and perhaps you've got a practice of listening with empathy, and maybe even an "empathy buddy" or two with whom you share the supportive and enriching practice of listening to each other with empathy.

At the same time, you're looking for ways to extend your current practice so that it might bring about even more positive transformation than you've already experienced.

Perhaps you'd like to try growing your capacity as an empathy buddy, while also developing your ability as a "self-connection buddy," to find still greater support from NVC to bring more joy to your life and to the lives of those around you.

Extra Resources to Support Learning and Integration

​Here you'll find links to handouts, videos and other resources:

https://www.communicationdojo.com/resource-page

Trainer - Newt Bailey

​Newt's passion is to help people connect, to experience greater intimacy, and to find the potential for mutually satisfying change that lies within conflict. He is also convinced that personal growth and change in consciousness is essential if we're to bring about the changes we want to see in our communities and our world.

​Since he started studying NVC in 2005 Newt has set out to understand and share with others the essential core of NVC. He believes strongly in teaching the principles of NVC in a way that frees students from specialized language, and allows facility with connected communication to grow in small, quickly assimilated steps. The Communication Dojo is both a place where Newt teaches the NVC practices, skills and awareness he uses in his own life, and also a place where Newt introduces his newest teaching tools, resources and ideas.

Since 2006 Newt has been facilitating NVC groups, leading workshops and retreats, and developing his unique approach in public and organizational settings. Newt also attributes great steps in his personal understanding of NVC to working with prisoners and parolees. He has taught NVC, NVC mediation and NVC coaching across the USA and in Europe.