This Hit Me Up event is open to the public, 21+.

About the Class

Using the lens of polyvagal theory, we will explore how your nervous system is your most essential s*x toy, and how tuning into its cues can transform your experience of s*x, k!nk, connection and consent. We will map how states of safety, activation and shutdown show up in the body during erotic encounters, whether in a crowded dungeon, on the 5th floor of HMU or in a quiet bedroom, and how trauma can shape our ability to stay present, communicate and receive. This is not a therapy session, but a chance to nerd out on the science of connection.

You'll learn how to recognize your own nervous system cues, get tools to co-regulate with partners, and gain insight into why you or others might disconnect, go quiet, spin out or suddenly get overwhelmed during or approaching play. Whether you're dominant, submissive, switchy, ace, monogamous, poly, demi, k!nky, vanilla, a sentient banana or anywhere in between, this workshop offers body-based, neuroscience-backed knowledge to help you show up with more curiosity, compassion, and clarity in your erotic life. n.b.: "trauma" will be discussed in general terms, which may be evocative for those with a trauma history. Please note that no content of traumas will be discussed, but the traumatic responses and impacts will be, and plan your self-care needs and boundaries accordingly. HMU has a generous, no-questions-asked refund policy if you're not feeling it that day.

About Your Instructor

Belle is a trauma therapist and academic in NYC. She is not the kind of doctor you should show a funny mole to, unless you need a hug about it. Belle is especially curious about how the research on attachment, arousal, and the nervous system all show up in the messy, beautiful world of s*x and connection.

FAQs

FAQ: what should I bring?

Note-taking materials, if that's your jam.

FAQ: any skill pre-requisites? (i.e., is this for beginners, advanced, everyone?)

Everyone! If you have had a little therapy or a self-reflective practice, you may find it particularly useful.

FAQ: what should I wear?

Whatever makes you happy that won't get you arrested on the subway (no nudity, except under your clothes).

FAQ: can I attend solo, or do I need to come with a partner?

Everyone is welcome in any combination.

STAY IN TOUCH!

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✨Volunteers: Limited volunteer spots available. Please email admin@hitmeupnyc.com to express interest.

✨Location: Lower Manhattan. The space has an elevator. Please email hello@hitmeupnyc.com if you need any accessibility accommodations.

✨Full vaccination is required. While we recommend getting the booster shots, we are not verifying them at this time.

✨Consent Policy: All of our events are ASK FIRST events. The rules of respectful and consensual behavior WILL be enforced. You will be responsible for reading our consent policy and behaving appropriately. Read our consent policy in full: https://www.hitmeupnyc.com/consent

✨Membership: We reserve the right to refuse entry if needed. Hit Me Up also hosts private events which are invite only, and anyone new to Hit Me Up must apply and be approved to attend—no guests or plus ones. Please visit https://www.hitmeupnyc.com/join to join. You are welcome to inquire as to your status or that of your friends, but please do not act as if you have an entitlement to access our space or members. Building special spaces is hard, and while we are inclusive and welcoming, we reserve the right to curate our membership as needed to maintain our flourishing community. If you'd like to sponsor a new member please have them apply as soon as possible. If they wait until a few days before the event we cannot guarantee they will be able to be approved in time.

✨Please stay home if you are feeling ill or if you have had recent close contact with someone who tested Covid positive (within the past 5 days). You could be incubating and still test negative. Any requests for refunds for any reason will be honored up to the day of the party. Remember: safe, sane, and sanitary Just email hello@hitmeupnyc.com and we will give you a full refund, no questions asked.

HMU Academy: Nervous System Literacy for Better Play