A: There may be other groups out there, but none are run like FYZ events!
2. Q: How is an FYZ event different from the others?
A: Yaakov is a frum certified life coach specializing in communication and relationships. He adds his special touch to all of his events and especially weekends. Every event of his offers an interactive workshop where you get some practical advice about dating as well as your questions answered - to the point. He always makes time during the event if someone wants to talk to him privately. Plus, he offers follow-up guidance.
3. Q: It sounds great that Yaakov offeres so much, but he’s only one person – can he handle the entire crowd?
A: No, he does not do everything on his own. However, Yaakov discusses with his facilitators/matchmakers what he expects from them prior to the event. In fact, Shabbos Nachamu has been divided into separate programs:
Chaviva (Waxman) Verschleisser has been very involved with various organizations for helping singles meet including SYAS Shabbos Nachamu events - she will be lending her own personal touch.
Moshe Verschleisser has been involved in community education and programming for several years, working with Partners In Torah, Birthright Israel, Oneg Shabbos and Tomchei Shabbos. He was recently named as the NY Coordinator for Jews for Judaism, the only full time counter-missionary organization in North American, and speaks regularly on their behalf. He has been interviewed by the NY Daily News, NY Post, Mishpacha Magazine, the Jewish Voice, and several other media. He has helped at several smaller singles programs, and looks forward to working with FindYourZivug.
Sarah (Gerber) Korman has also been very involved with the planning committee for SYAS Shabbos Nachamu event as well as being involved in various chesed programs.
Yitzy Korman a modern Chasidish boy from Boro Park, now married to Sarah, has been helping individuals in general, and has proven to be most helpful on events.
Efraim Levy, well known in the community and in the singles arena for founding Singles4Singles.
Leeba Grunstein a graduate of Mesores Bais Yaakov & Ma'alot brings her talents to the events, proving that one can be Frum & with it.
EVENT CHAIR, Yaakov Grunstein will be in charge of the overall program, making sure things are running smoothly as he always has.
4. Q: That sounds great, but it is so hard to meet people at these events.
A: Find Your Zivug Corp. makes sure that the facilitators and matchmakers are ones that the singles can relate to. He instructs his matchmakers to work with those “at the event” so you will be introduced to as many people as possible. (Private meetings with the matchmakers are done at the very end of the event (in this case Sunday) so you can still give over your information and ask the matchmakers to keep you in mind for their other “clients” in case you don’t meet someone at the event.
5. Q: Have any shidduchim come out of such events.
A: We can’t speak for all events, but Yaakov’s events have yielded quite a few shidduchim. Additionally, at each of our events, several participants left with a first date agreed to (thanks to the facilitaors).
6. Q: I hate the concept where the guys feel they have to ask a girl for her number or the evening was a failure - will the girls be put on the spot?
A: No! We strongly suggest to all those girls that want to be discrete or use a shadchan to simply tell the young man that she would prefer to have a third party involved. Additionally, if someone is interested in someone he/she has spoken to, then he/she is advised to approach a shadchan or facilitator to find out if the other party is mutually interested or to write down the person’s name and Ruchy (our secretary) will follow up after the weekend to find out if the other person is interested. At that point, contact information will be exchanged (only with agreement from both parties, of course).
Once you start dating, Yaakov, as a coach, will work with you to help make the relationship work, often at no charge.
7. Q: You have advertised that you have “matchmakers” and “facilitators”. What’s the difference?
A: A matchmaker is someone who either has set hours where he/she can be reached and has a broad client base that he/she works with to make shidduchim. Often they are professional, are affiliated with a website, and/or (outside of our event) take a fee either for the initial meeting or when they make a shidduch or both. Our facilitators are young married couples who have been in the scene themselves not too long ago, who relate to the singles and who the singles relate to. While they may have contacts and know lots of people and it is definitely worthwhile talking to them and perhaps giving them your information at the end of the event, their main goal is to circulate the crowds and make sure that everyone is comfortable and enjoying and getting to meet as many people as they can. If you are shy to approach a single, you can approach a facilitator who can either help you get over your shyness or find out if the other person is interested in you as well. Between both facilitators and shadchanim, you definitely have your bases covered.
8. Q: These events all sound great, but they are so expensive! Why do they cost so much?
A: We try to keep our events priced as low as possible. In fact, Yaakov works very hard to stay within an affordable budget, and often has to work out special deals and/or get sponsorships to keep his prices as low as he does. The events are as close to “at-cost” as possible. Yaakov makes nothing off his events (and sometimes even takes a small loss when necessary to make sure, to the best of his abilities, that he delivers everything he promises.) His events are quality events! You cannot get a better price for everything that you will get at his events, anywhere else!
9. Q: I hear you, but can’t you cut corners to make things a little cheaper?
A: Perhaps things could be slightly cheaper by doing things more “camp style” and having participants help out instead of hiring onsite caterers and waiters, etc. But keep in mind that the atmosphere does lend to attitude. When people attend an UPSCALE EVENT, they feel better about themselves. PLUS the atmosphere is more conducive to haveing quality people whom otherwise you most likely would not have met.
10. Q: I heard Yaakov deals with a more modern crowd too. Is this true.?
A: As mentioned above, Yaakov is a Certified Professional Coach who helps ALL people with their issues. Given today's society, he is so valuable. He is Frum, lives in Monsey, yet as a professional, understands the needs and desires of different people. Like many Rabanim, he believes in Kiruv.
Therefore, he created TWO independent groups. His original group, NYTW, is open to all Jews and has a larger age span. FYZ is a completly separate legal corporation and was created specifically for people who are more machmir than the typical modern orthodox person but not necessarily yeshivish or chasidish.
While he tried some events that catered to both modern and machmir and got positive feedback, he now creates separate events for the separate groups - as it is simply more productive for both!
Additionally, we have received feedback from participants of other groups (not ran by him) that said when machmir & modern are in the same hotel or setting it just doesn't work out. It has proven impossible for the organizers to separate the crowds.
Be assured, if you sign up for a FYZ event, you will be guaranteed that all attendees fit within our restricted age group (which is always posted) and at the very minimum, fit our “machmir” description, i.e. women who WANT to cover their hair when they are married and men who WANT their wives to cover their hair.
11. Q: Sounds great, but I heard sometimes organizers, despite what they say, do allow others that don’t belong.
A: Anyone who knows Yaakov, knows his word is golden. He has a team of people that will be screening the attendees. Furthermore, we are backed by Rabanim and if we were to deviate from the program we would loose their backing!
12. Q: You mention covering of the hair - what about television, davening, tznius etc.?
A: As a certified life coach, and having discussed this matter with many singles in particular and rabbanim and shadchanim in general, Yaakov has found that someone who covers their hair or wants their wife to, is likely davening 3 times a day, as well as other "machmir" attributes that usually cluster together. As far as movies and TV, we have found that those items should be up for individual discussion, especially when the basic precepts of hashkafa are established. Often, if the parties are interested in one another, they are usually more flexible on those items; hence they truly are not a deal-breaker (from the outset).
In addition, so many shidduchim are nixed simply because the little boxes haven’t been checked off properly. For example, when speaking with one individual, she told Yaakov that she was looking for someone who was Koveah Itim, davening with a minyan 3 times a day aside from other things. While conversing she admitted that she would understand if her husband wouldn’t be able to make it to shul in the middle of the day or if he was too tired to have a chavrusa every night (but of course, that wasn’t one of the choices on the form). From the outset, a shadchan might not have set her up with such a person, as it was not what she specified.
13. Q. Who is “FYZ”?
A: We are a group of people dedicated to helping the FRUM ORTHODOX crowd find their Zivug.This is a group of dedicated volunteers who work hard to bring together singles in a comfortable atmosphere and help them meet as many of the participants as possible throughout the course of an upscale weekend.
14. Q: Sounds great, but can you define FRUM ORTHODOX?
A: For obvious reasons we are breaking away from all the current labels. However, if we had to use the current labels we would say our events are catering to all those that are machmir through yeshivish/chasidish modern - not modern orthodox.
15. Q: GREAT so now you have a new label?!
A: Kind of but not exactly - by definition, if you are signing up for one of our events you are (at the minimum requirement) as follows:
A woman who “WANTS” to cover her hair when she is married
A man who “WANTS” his wife to cover her hair when she is married
16. Q: What do you mean, “covered hair?” Why that?
A: It seems like the easiest way to quickly define where you stand in regards to halacha and hashkafa without having to bother with those pesky labels!
17. Q: What about Yeshivish or Chasidish people, can they attend?
A: As specified above, we want them to understand who is here. So if such a person would like to attend, they are more than welcome.
18. Q: Cool, but how do I know that I’m meeting people who are the right age for me?
A: That’s why there will be assigned seating for meals and speed-dating.
19. Q: Who is Yaakov?
A: Yaakov Grunstein. He has been running events for over a decade for both the modern and machmir crowd, (both together and individually) first he spear headed Shidduch Convention before SYAS came into existance, then as a volunteer co-organizer for other organizations and eventually starting up on his own. He is also a certified life coach, specializing in relationships and communication. You can check out his website: www.PeacefulResolutionsUSA.com.
Find Your Zivug Corp.
Endorsed by leading Rabanim, Shadchanim, and facilitators.
Certified master dating coach on staff.
Families are always welcome and even encouraged to join us, when we go to hotels.
After having attended a Shabbaton run by Yaakov Grunstein and the Find Your Zivug group, [Shabbos Nachamu 2013] I can truly say that I am impressed. The professionalism displayed in each and every detail made Shabbos a true pleasure. The shiurim and speakers were stimulating and interesting and the food and accommodations were first class! Most of all, I was impressed by the singles program. Tremendous care was given to make sure that, not only were a high caliber of persons present, but FYZ went the extra mile to make sure that each single had multiple opportunities to connect in meaningful ways. I highly recommend FYZ and applaud Yaakov on a job well done! I hope to participate in future events and to see many other join as well. Rabbi Benzion Z Klatzko
I just came home from spending an amazing Shabbos Nachamu at the Hilton in Stamford Conn. [Shabbos Nachamu 2013] There are not enough words to express my Hakoras Hatov for this program. And I write this with tears of gratitude.
As a shadchan I've facilitated at many programs of this nature and venue. However, this program was one I thank Hashem for giving me the zechus to be a part of.
Yaakov Grunstein - the care and sensitivity you placed in every aspect of the shabbaton was clearly evident. From the ample amount of food, nosh and activities geared for meeting, surpassed anything I have ever witnessed. You delivered everything you promised 100%. You truly care about these singles, and I was very touched to be viewing this from my objective angle. May Hashem bentch you and your lovely wife, Leeba for all you do on behalf of those seeking a shidduch.
Yitzy and Sarah Korman, Moshe and Chaviva Verschleisser and Efraim Levy - your devotion to making this program a success was surely felt by the participants.
Rabbi Tzvi Flaum, Rabbi Benzion Klatzko and Rabbi Tovia Singer - you wowed us beyond belief with your shiurim.
Acharon Acharon Chaviv - to the dear singles who attended, you made this possible. You gave each person on staff the opportunity to be able to fulfill this mitzvah in partnering with Hashem. May you all be happily married by next Shabbos Nachamu! SYAS Shadchan & radio host Baila S
Rabbi Boruch Simon- Rosh Yeshiva of Yeshiva University
Rabbi Kenneth Auman, YI of Flatbush
Rabbi Yoel Schonfeld,YI of Kew Garden Hills
Rabbi Yaakov Lehrfield, YI of Staten Island
Rabbi Zvi Flaum - Rosh Yeshiva of Lander College
and several others that choose to remain anonymous at this time.
Shadchanim and facilitators who agreed to publicly endorse this event include but are not limited to:
Mrs. Dasi Goldberg,
Mrs. Esterina Tafrizi,
Mrs. Anna Aronovitch - SYAS MM,
Mr. & Mrs. Allen & Debby Leibowitz
Mr. and Mrs. Sarah and Yitzy Korman,
Mrs. Esther Zywica
Mrs. Chaya Goldsmith
Mrs. Heidie Leifer
Mr. & Mrs. Moshe and Chaviva Verschleisser